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Transcript: Lore-ytime 1/6/2014 - The Black Temple/ Karabor

by Lessonsinlore, 63 days ago

For those who missed it, here's the transcript from 1/6/2013's Lore-ytime Event! Catch us in Orgrimmar in The Broken Tusk (just inside the gates and to the right, two doors down) Monday nights at 10pm server time on Earthen Ring (US)!

Firana says:I'm Megan
Lubel says: I'm Chad
Firana says: And we're from Lessons in Lore
Lubel says: .com
Firana says: Of Twitter, Facebook, and Dragon Con fame
Lubel says: fame is a relative term
Firana says: Each week, we gather here and Chad and I take turns telling a story from the Lore of Warcraft
Firana says: We're a bit irrevrent.
Ferdie says: unless you like the lore
Ferdie says: which im usually pretty in to
Firana says: It's not a quiet event. If you feel like saying something, go for it
Firana says: Just don't be a dick
Ferdie says: righto misses
Firana says: So! Without further adieu...let's roll on in to tonight's Loreytime!
Asherondei claps excitedly.
Hatercraft cheers at you.
Lubel says: woo hoo
Firana says: It's a special Raid Edition. We'll be doing a silly run through Black Temple afterwards
Lubel says: I plan 3 wipes minimum
Ferdie says: im down
Firana says: Long ago, on a planet called Draenor, some blue goat people called Draenei built a beautiful temple called The Temple of Karabor.
Lubel says: Who's Karabor?
Firana says: No clue. The temple is the home of the Draenei leader, Prophet Velen. When Velen isn’t touring the various Draenei settlements, he hides out in Karabor.
Lubel says: he hides a lot
Lubel says: and runs away
Asherondei says:  A LOT
Firana says: The temple was a place of beauty, light, and peace…until the local orcs go crazy with some demonic bloodlust and sack it. Velen runs and hides, and the orcs desecrate the temple at the behest of their spiritual leader, Gul’dan.
Lubel says: They were baptist
Ferdie says: HAH
Firana says: Akama, a Draenei priest in the Temple, manages to evacuate many civilians from the city before following his leader into hiding.
Lubel says: Velen playing hide and seek, Akama playing follow the leader
Firana says: lol
Firana says: Gul’Dan decides he wants the temple for himself and does some redecorating to make it the headquarters of his secret Shadow Council. He renames it, The Black Temple.
Asherondei says: didn't Boy George do a song about Akama during the 80s??
Lubel says: it prefers "African American" temple
Asherondei says: Nubian perhaps?
Firana says: Gul’Dan holds his Seekrit Meetings there for a while, sends folks around to wipe out the remaining Draenei settlements (like Shattrath City) then decides it’s time to go invading other worlds.
Firana says: Most of the orcs go stomping off through the Dark Portal to invade Azeroth.  Gul’dan gets killed about halfway through the invasion, and the rest of it goes pretty poorly.
Firana says: Back on Draenor, the Black Temple sits and seeps evil.
Firana says: Eventually, Ner’Zhul, Gul’dan’s teacher, decides that Azeroth isn’t worth it, and they should really just leave for other worlds. But, he needs some artifacts to do the ritual that would open portals to all those worlds.
Lubel says: It had a leaky evil faucet
Firana says: So he sends some folks to Azeroth to fetch them, which they do, and he starts heading towards The Black Temple to perform the ritual.
Firana says: The Alliance on Azeroth wasn’t too happy about this, and they come through the Dark Portal and chase him all the way to the Temple.
Lubel says: (/que Benny Hill Music)
Asherondei says: lol
Firana says: However Ner’zhul manages to complete the ritual, which opens thousands of portals all across the land, ripping the world apart.
Firana says: As the world shattered, Ner’zhul jumped through a portal, only to end up in Kil’jaeden’s clutches, where he gets killed and resurrected into the Lich King and sent to do bad things on Azeroth.
Lubel says: Kil'jaeden has an "un-delete" button on people's lives.
Asherondei says: one day I will ask Kil'jaeden questions....because to be so smart he sure is a dumb ass
Firana says: Conveniently, when Draenor shatters, the Black Temple is left standing. Well, mostly. It gets taken over by a bunch of demons from the Burning Legion.
Lubel says: squatters...
Firana says: Now it just so happens that a Night Elf-turned-Demon named Illidan Stormrage was looking for a good place to hide from Kil’jaeden, one of the commanders of the Burning Legion. Black Temple seemed like a good place.
Lubel says: He was swayed by Velen's Yelp review... "Five star hiding place"
Hatercraft says: this is exciting if only i knew who was who hehe
Firana says: Unfortunately for Illidan, the Black Temple was overrun with Burning Legion demons, and ruled by the Pit Lord, Magtheridon. Luckily, the pit lord was busy fighting some deformed (read: broken) Draenei survivors led by Akama.
Lubel says: Velen is leader of the Dreanei, Illidan is/was a Nightelf...
Hatercraft says: oh ok  ty
Lubel says: np
Firana says: Tired of losing the fight, Akama allies with Kael’thas Sunstrider and Lady Vashj, eventually swearing his loyalty to Illidan.
Firana says: The Broken Draenei serve as a diversion so Vashj and Kael’thas can disable the dimensional gateways that were bringing constant demonic reinforcements to Magtheridon.
Lubel says: that sounded like English.
Firana says: Having stemmed the tide of reinforcements, Akama and some of his sneaky friends stealth into The Black Temple, destroying the source of the magical defenses, so Illidan could lead the charge against the Pit Lord.
Firana says: With Magtheridon defeated, the Black Temple had yet a new master, Illidan Stormrage. Unfortunately, killing a member of the Burning Legion to escape the notice of a member of the Burning Legion isn’t a good tactic for hiding.
Lubel says: Velen disapproves
Firana says: Kil’jaeden shows up and sends Illidan back to Azeroth to get back on the job of destroying The Frozen Throne like he was supposed to. So Akama’s left in charge.
Lubel says: He totally slept in Illidan's bed while he was away
Firana says: Apparently, things don’t go too well for Illidan on Azeroth. He limps back to the Black Temple and takes up permanent residence there, leaving his family and fans alike to gossip whether or not he’s gone off the deep end.
Hatercraft says: lol
Lubel says: Hiring lots and lots of concubines...
Rennjì says: woohoo
Asherondei says: ...thats what i do when i get bummed too
Firana says: He does manage to succeed in capturing his old jailer, Maiev Shadowsong, and imprisons her in The Black Temple, with Akama as her warden.
Lubel laughs at Asherondei.
Firana says: Illidan fortifies his position in the temple, gathering all sorts of unsavory types, and works to tighten his grip on the shattered world of Draenor, now known as Outland.
Ferdie says: u havin a giggle m8 i ll hook u rite in teh gabber i shware on me mum
Firana says: Meanwhile, the Dark Portal re-opens, and in come Alliance and Horde forces, who cause chaos and muck about with things, like accidentally reconstituting the death knight, Teron Gorefiend, allowing him to go join the party in The Black Temple
Lubel says: hang on hang on... still trying to read Ferdie's comment
Firana says: Unbeknownst to Illidan, his servant Akama isn’t as loyal as he seems.
Ferdie says: ;)
Lubel says: Akama had his fingers crossed when swearing loyalty.
Asherondei says: he was akama kama kama kameleon....
Firana says: It turns out only a small dark part of Akama’s soul is bound to Illidan, a shade, if you will.
Lubel says: lol
You clap excitedly for Asherondei.
Asherondei says: **drops mic**
Asherondei says: lol
Firana says: The Alliance and Horde forces (you) stumble into Black Temple, fighting through Illidan’s monstrous lieutenants, including an odd collection of concubines (presumably they were there to help Illidan get over Tyrande).
Koksaburo says: good bit of lore sho far, *sips  Flask of Bitter Cactus Cider*
Firana says: Sometime before or after you fight the concubines, you encounter the dark Shade of Akama and kill it. This manages to free Akama’s soul from Illidan’s control.
Firana says: Liberated, Akama and his fellow broken race on to open the gates to the top of the Temple, charging in with their new friends to fight Illidan the Betrayer, Lord of Outland.
Firana says: Partway through the fight, Akama runs off.
Lubel says: he left the stove on.
Asherondei says: had a little Velen left in him...
Firana says: lol
Firana says: The reason for his sudden departure is revealed towards the end of the fight, when things are looking bleak for our heroes, and a freed Maiev Shadowsong leaps into the fray!
Koksaburo says: ugh shadowsong *spits*
Firana says: Together, they strike down Illidan, who dies, taking away Maiev’s one purpose for existing for the past 10,000 years. With Illidan dead, Akama takes control of the temple once more, vowing to make it a bastion of light once more.
Firana says: Of course, such a cleanup will take quite a while.
Ferdie applauds.  Bravo!
Firana says: Sometime after the fall of Deathwing on Azeroth, a pair of Warlocks, Kanrethad Ebonlocke and Jubeka Shadowbreaker, journeyed through the Dark Portal.
Hatercraft claps excitedly for you.
Lubel says: they hit 60
Ferdie says: HAAA
Asherondei says: lol
Firana says: Jubeka and Kanrethad were representatives of a Warlock organization called the Council of the Black Harvest, a group of six of the greatest warlocks, all seeking the power of their defeated enemies to share with each other and their students.
You love Lubel.
Firana says: Their purpose was to find ways to bind the more powerful demons of Outland as their pets, and to uncover the secret of Illidan’s control over the demons of the Burning Legion.
Firana says: Jubeka disdainfully follows Kanrethad around for a while through a variety of misadventures, which she documents in her journal. Before one final adventure, she stores her soul in a soulstone, shattering it into four pieces.
Asherondei says: horcruxes??
Firana says: lol
Firana says: She hides the pieces in locations that she mentioned in her journal, and sends the book itself to a warlock friend back in Azeroth.
Lubel says: To open the chamber of secrets
Firana says: This friend happens to be a trainer of Warlocks, and sends one of them off to Outland to figure out what happened to Jubeka.
Ferdie points at Rennjì.
Firana says: As the fragments of the soulstone are collected, the young warlock sees visions of Jubeka’s memories from those locations. Once the fragments are combined, the soulstone itself draws the Warlock to The Black Temple.
Firana says: The Warlock sneaks in, avoiding the hostile Broken Draenei within until she bumps into our old buddy, Akama. Because of the assistance granted in the fight against Illidan by players, Akama gives the warlock a free pass.
Lubel says: And a coupon to Ikea
Firana says: Akama leads the warlock to the Shrine of Lost Souls, where the warlock sees another vision of Jubeka—in the vision, Jubeka and Kanrethad discover that the arcane energies of the Shine were the price paid to the Illidari demons.
Lubel says: they asked for minimum wage, but you know, whatevs
Firana says: In an attempt to harvest this power, Jubeka and Kanrethad set up an arcane crystal, but it takes a long time to charge. The vision fades, and the warlock is left to fight a very angry guardian called the Essence of Order.
Firana says: Once it’s defeated, the Warlock collects the crystal and continues on the BC Raids: Where Are They Now? Tour, fleeing a bunch of angry demons.
Asherondei says: ...those guys are always angry
Firana says: After a “Shop ‘Til You Drop” run through the Den of Mortal Delights, the warlock heads up to the summit of the temple, and tosses the empowered stone into a Soulwell, which apparently summons Kanrethad, who has become a Demon Warlock.
Lubel says: Can the warlock summon themselves?
Lubel says: set themselves to passive?
Firana says: The warlock and Kanrathad fight it out, until Jubeka shows up and banishes her once-sane colleague. She hauls him off to the vicinity of the Hand of Gul’dan, where she manages her banishment of him to this day.
Lubel says: did they just split up Gul'dan's body parts at his death, or what?
Firana says: As for the Temple? It remains, still dark and tainted, but undergoing the slow process of cleansing at the hands of Akama and his fellow Ashtongue Deathsworn.
Lubel says: they're using 409 and those magic erasers.
Asherondei says:
Firana says: n the upcoming expansion, Warlords of Draenor, we’ll be traveling to an alternate reality of Draenor, where the Temple of Karabor still stands in all its pure glory.
Lubel laughs at Asherondei.
Lubel says: concubines of a much higher caliber.
Firana says: I look forward to seeing the temple. With Guard's Mark on my Buff Meter.
Hatercraft cheers at you.
Lubel says: lol
Hatercraft says: lol someone threw a part grenade
Firana says: And that's the Story of the Black Temple!
Asherondei cheers!
Lubel says: Woo hoo
Firana says: Thank you all for coming out for tonight's story!
Hatercraft says: i need to read that lore time website to get up to date
Firana says: www.lessonsinlore.com
Hatercraft says: i was lost
Hatercraft says: hehe
Firana says: Come to DragonCon and see our live shows
Lubel says: if you liked what you heard, we do this every Monday at 10

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Transcript: Lore-ytime 12/30/2012 - Neltharion/Deathwing

by Lessonsinlore, 63 days ago

For those who missed it, here's the transcript from 12/30/2013's Lore-ytime Event! Catch us in Orgrimmar in The Broken Tusk (just inside the gates and to the right, two doors down) Monday nights at 10pm server time on Earthen Ring (US)!

 

Lubel says: HELLO!!!
Lubel says: Welcome to Lore-ytime
Lubel says: I'm Chad
Lubel says: no really... I am...
Firana says: I'm Megan!
Lubel says: there we go
Moglet says: I'm Jess :D
Lubel says: And we're from Lessonsinlore.com
Lubel says: You can find us on Facebook and Twitter
Moglet applauds at Lubel.  Bravo!
Moglet cheers at you.
Moglet applauds at you.  Bravo!
Lubel says: well for those of you new to Lore-ytime... these are not quiet events.
Moglet says: I'm new
Moglet says: and new to ER Too :D
You cheer at Moglet.
Lubel says: if you have questions or comments, just shout them out... just, you know... don't be a dick...
Moglet hugs you.
You wave at Asherondei.
Asherondei cheers!
Moglet says: No worries, I GM Civitas :D
Lubel says: Alrighty then...
Lubel says: Since it’s Christmastime, I felt it was a great time to tell the story of Deathwing. You know… for obvious reasons.
Lubel says: You know, because he’s a big mythic guy who flew all around the world dropping presents off for people in various zones. Just like Santa…
Firana says: If Deathwing’s Chin counts as a beard, you may be onto something here.
Moglet says: ROFL
Lubel says: So let’s tell this from the beginning. Back when Deathwing was a small grey Protodragon. Back then, most Dragons didn’t speak.
Firana says: Unless spoken to.
Lubel says: Two that could sort of speak were Malygos (a blue and white dragon) and Neltharian, (a grey one).
Lubel says: So Malygos is attacked by a Blue and Green dragon named Coros, and mocked because he was blue and white.
Moglet says: Killed them woohooo
Firana says: Basic Bloods vs. Cripps storyline.
Moglet says: sorry couldn't resist :)
Lubel says: But Neltharian helps Malygos fight them off. Later, they start learning of a plot by one of the Protodragons, named Galakrond, to eat dragons and steal their power… Which apparently works.
Firana says: That’s why undead are the most powerful race in the game.
Lubel says: Anyway, Galakrond grows huge and Malygos teams up with Neltharian and about three other Dragons to take him down… Coros gets eaten, and the good guys win.
Asherondei says: ...we need to set up a buffet at Wrymrest temple...
Firana says: Just like Santa.
Lubel says: The Titans then step in. They decide to have an experiment on Azeroth, though most of the details on what it’s all about are kept to themselves.
Firana says: I experimented with world building back when I was in college. You know, just to see what it was like.
Moglet says: lol
Moglet says: Lessons in lore ROCKS :D :D :D
Lubel says: Neltharian is chosen by Kaz’Garoth to control the earth and deep places of the world. This gives him power, and wisdom, and intelligence.
Moglet says: Wooooot
Firana says: And turns him black… apparently… Just like Santa.
Moglet says: yay Santa
Lubel says: Neltharian spends the next long while tending to the mortal races of the planet and carving rivers and mountains to help them out. Like a good neighbor.
Lubel says: He kept hanging out with his buddy Malygos though, the Blue Magical dragon. But things weren’t great for Neltharian. In fact, he was really really depressed.
Firana says: He was sad because Alexstrasza was grossed out by his “once you go black…” comment.
Moglet says: why did we have to kill them all /cry
Lubel says: You see, Neltharian didn’t view his intelligence and wisdom as a blessing. More like a curse. Responsibilities he didn’t want, and didn’t ask for to take care of people he didn’t like.
Firana says: The Jersey Shore cast?
You gently pat Moglet.
Asherondei says: kind of like the Atlanta PD
Lubel says: He viewed this Burden with disdain and eventually sought to rid himself of it by enlisting the aid of the Old Gods. They convinced him that such a “regression” was possible, but difficult.
Moglet says: ROFL
Lubel claps excitedly for Asherondei.
Firana says: lol Ash
Firana says: Like assembling the three piece statue in Legend of the Hidden Temple.
Lubel says: They told him to watch out for the other dragonflights, and so he actively became paranoid against other dragons. He wanted a world with only black dragons… and Ysera and Alexstrasza as his consort slaves.
Firana says: What’s the point of being an evil dictator if you can’t have sex slaves in Gold bikinis?
Moglet says: Dragons rule!!!! :D
Moglet says: Why do we have to kill them all?
Moglet cries on Lubel's shoulder.
Lubel says: right?
Firana says: Santa, by the way… dozens of sex slaves.
Moglet says: hahaha too Star War-sian
Lubel laughs at you.
Moglet says: SWTOR is thata way :P
Firana says: lol
Lubel says: And it’s with their instruction, that Neltharian creates the Dragon soul with a bit of his own blood and with the help of the Goblins. And it’s shielded to keep the other dragons from seeing the evil inside.
Firana says: Aw… Goblins are like Santa’s little helpers.
Lubel says: So when the Burning Legion arrives on Azeroth, Neltharian steps up his plan and rushes to convince the other Dragons to put some of their power into the disk… to make a weapon. Malygos helped convince everyone.
Moglet says: And fantastic engineers?
Moglet says: Dragons, dragons everywhere?
Firana says: The Dragonsoul is the Nigerian prince scheme.
Lubel says: So Neltharian takes it to Zin’Ashari, where Neltharian uses it to destroy a bunch of demons and Nightelves and whomever else was there.
Firana says: Neltharian accidentally left “friendly fire” on. Woops.
Moglet says: Pyramid schemes, got to love them :P
Moglet says: ROFL
Lubel says: The other Dragons freak out and move to attack him. But in one move, wipes out just about all of the Blue Dragonflight. In his second move, he paralyzes all the Dragons, killing a bunch more of them.
Moglet says: Then why do we have to kill them all?
Firana says: Feel the Fury of St. Nicholas.
Lubel says: Neltharian escapes, but the other Aspects and their Dragonflights don’t pursue, because damn… that whole paralysis destruction thing is pretty messed up, right? They rename the object, the Demonsoul.
Moglet says: ooooooooooooooooooooooooooh
Moglet says: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Firana says: They named it after its inventor; Roy Bartholomew Demonsoul.
Moglet says: lol
Lubel says: So Neltharian takes his treasure trinket back to his lair in the lonely mountain, but being so close to it all the time isn’t good for his complexion. His skin is tore apart, and magma oozed out.
Asherondei says: lol
Firana says: I had the same thing during puberty.
Firana says: ...I got better.
Moglet says: Lovely imagery :P
Moglet says: Bring out the dead :P
Lubel says: The Goblins forged him Elementium plates to hold him together. They rename him “Deathwing”. Any guesses as to why?
Firana says: He was named for the guy who made the plates… Philip Aaron Deathwing.
Asherondei says: he tears the wings off of flies?
Lubel says: So then Malfurian steals the Demonsoul, and Deathwing doesn’t see it again for a long while. And he just sits there and broods for a few thousand years.
Firana says: Actually he was catching up on Dr. Who. It takes about 10,000 years to catch up on the whole thing.
Moglet says: ooh ooh, how long do Dragons live?
Lubel says: forever
Firana says: I don't know of any that died of old age...
Moglet says: Is there anything we can kill apart from Dragons as raid bosses? :P
Lubel says: dragon cancer
Firana says: Tyranastrasz was crazy-old, but he was killed by Deathwing and dragon-cancer
Moglet says: hahahaha
Lubel says: So during the second war, Deathwing figures out the location of the Demonsoul, but can’t wield it because of some enchantment placed on it by the other Dragon Aspects.
Moglet says: Deathwing fight was horrible :(
Firana says: They licked it to claim it as their own.
Moglet says: Worst boss EVA !!! :P
Lubel says: So instead, he starts leading the conveniently named “Dragon Maw” orcs to it. When Zuluhead the Whacked gets it, he hands it off to Nekkros Skull crusher, who uses it to enslave Alexstraza and the red Dragons.
Firana says: And put her in that Gold Bikini thing from Return of the Jedi.
Moglet says: SWTOR is thata way :P
Lubel says: At that point, they start using her to make dragon babies… you know, for the war. Neltharian sends Nekros an “advisor” named Kryll. Kryll is a Goblin who makes all kinds of crazy suggestions.
Asherondei says: in dragon form....or that hottie atop Wrymrest?
Firana says: lol
Moglet says: lol
Lubel says: she's still wearing it, in elf form.
Firana says: Santa’s little helper advised Nekros to make Alexstrasza eat a whole spoon full of Cinnamon.
Lubel says: Now Deathwing wasn’t sitting idly by, either. He met up with Teron Gorefeind, an Orc trapped in a human body.
Firana says: It doesn’t matter how you’re born; if you identify as an orc, people should treat you like an orc.
Moglet says: ol
Moglet says: keke
Asherondei says: lol
Lubel says: Deathwing agrees to help him go around gathering artifacts in exchange for getting help taking some eggs to Draenor. When they move them though, the eggs are crushed and the dragons killed by Gruul.
Moglet says: It's not easy being an orc....
Lubel says: Khadgar then attacks Deathwing and so Deathwing moves on to try something else. Fun fact though, the eggs that survived, got warped by the fel energies and became Netherdrakes.
Firana says: The slowest rep grind this side of the Bloodsail Buchaneers.
Moglet says: ba da bing
Moglet says: oh too true, arghhhhhhhhhh
Lubel says: Back on the Azerothian side of the Portal, Some mages are pissed about Deathwing destroying most of Dalaran, so they attack him and he pretends to die.
Firana says: Then laying a finger on the side of his Chin, with a flap of his wings, he went back to Azeroth again.
Lubel says: Instead, he takes on human form and becomes Lord Daval Prestor and tries manipulating King Terenas Menethil II into letting him become king of Alterac… though it’s unclear why he wanted that.
Moglet says: Why isn't thsi just World of Dragoncraft :P
Moglet says: 95% of bosses are dragons right after all ? :P
Lubel says: For some reason, he also convinces King Menethil to give his daughter, Calia Menethil to Prestor for marriage. Calia, Arthas’ sister, you might remember, doesn’t exist outside of this small story deadend.
Asherondei says: ...i think if I were an Aspect, i'd go for something bigger than Alterac
Firana says: She’ll be a boss four expansions from now… trying to claim the frozen throne as her own.
Moglet cheers at Asherondei!
Moglet laughs at Asherondei.
Lubel says: So Prestor tried to use the mistrust of the Humans against the Dragonmaw in an attempt to scare the orcs into moving the Dragons away from Grim Batol, thus abandoning eggs he could steal for himself.
Moglet says: Ah Grim Batol, fun dungeon :P
Firana says: Deathwing wanted an omelet.
Lubel says: So Deathwing picks up Rhonin and delivers him to Grim Batol, this scares the orcs and they start to move Alexstrasza and the eggs. So Deathwing attacks.
Moglet says: or Gold like Smaug
Firana says: Years of careful planning and manipulating and Deathwing just attacks… no plan or nothing?
Asherondei says: I wonder if Deathwing was jealous of Rhonin's hair...
Lubel says: Nekkros tries to use the Demonsoul on him… It has no effect at all. That’d be silly if it had an effect on him. Completely ridiculous.
Firana says: But… Thrall… and the…
Moglet says: Or perhaps' Legolas; hair?
Lubel says: So Long story short, Deathwing fails, Rhonin destroys the Demonsoul, Alexstrasza eats Nekros. And Deathwing and Daval Prestor both disappear for years.
Firana says: Yada Yada, Bruce Willis was dead the whole time.
Moglet says: ROFL
Moglet says: i see dead people :P :P :P
Lubel says:  So, Deathwing is brooding in the Stonecore of Deepholm, where he’s recovering and growing angry or whatever. Then he’s found by the Twilight’s hammer cult who work to rebuild him.
Firana says: We can rebuild him, make him faster, stronger, larger chin… we have the technology.
Moglet says: ROFL"
Lubel says: So when he’s finally ready, he explodes out of there and begins traveling the world giving presents to all the good little boys and girls… Just kidding he brings fire. Lots of fire.
Firana says: But when he visits you he does bring you an achievement [stood in the fire].
Moglet says: FIRE In the hold
Asherondei says: lol
Moglet says: Oh best ach EVA :D
Lubel says: In the Badlands, Reahstrasza takes one of Deathwing’s baby eggs and hides it, purifying it. Deathwing kills her. (note: that egg contained Wrathion).
Firana says: The Whiny dragon formerly known as Prince.
Lubel says: Deathwing’s minions run amuck all over Azeroth doing various random things like trying to kill Nordrassil, and trying to use the Engine of the makers to destroy the world. Nothing they do works.
Asherondei says: **SYMBOL**
Firana says: Almost as much a failure as Tyrion Fordring, huh?
Lubel says: As Deathwing is making his plans, he reveals that in a vision he could be defeated by an Orc named Thrall who was 5”10 with blue eyes and black hair and wearing Cabala beads.
Firana says: An oddly specific prediction.
Asherondei says: he remembers he toked up with him one day...
Lubel says: So Deathwing sends a priest, Archbishop Benedictus to kill him. You know, instead of hiring an assassin or someone powerful enough to kill him.
Firana says: Oh no, nothing’s working… Send in the nuns, followed by the orphans.
Lubel says: So Thrall and the four remaining Dragon aspects decide that they need to kill Deathwing. But how? I know!!! The Demonsoul, they’ll use that as a weapon against him.
Moglet says: I remember the silly Benedictus fight :P
Firana says: But… Nekros… and the…
Lubel says: So they travel back through time to the well of eternity, there they Steal the Demonsoul and take it to Wyrmrest accord. There, Thrall uses it to hurt Deathwing really severely. It’s super effective on him.
Firana says: Not even pretending that there’s a reason it works now, huh?
Lubel says: So between that and the eighteen phases of the battle with him, Deathwing is killed. Thus restoring… something… maybe. But the dragons then lose their powers and become mortal.
Asherondei says: BECAUSE METZEN SAID SO....MOVE ALONG...
Lubel laughs at Asherondei.
Firana says: Just as everyone does on New Year's Day during the walk of shame
Lubel says: So that, ladies and Gentlemen, is the story of Deathwing, the Dead.
Asherondei says: sad...he was a brave lad
Lubel says: Thank you... both for coming out.
You cheer at Lubel.
Asherondei cheers!
Asherondei claps excitedly.

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Transcript: Lore-ytime 12/16/2013 - The Story of Lor'themar

by Lessonsinlore, 63 days ago

For those who missed it, here's the transcript from 12/16/2013! Catch us in Orgrimmar in The Broken Tusk (just inside the gates and to the right, two doors down) Monday nights at 10pm server time on Earthen Ring (US)!

Firana says: So! It's LOREYTIME!!!
Cuddlestorm says: YAY!
Bigrend says: huzzah!
Lubbell says: HURRAY!!!
Firana says: Any newcomers tonight?
Cuddlestorm says: Nah, just us cool kids.
Firana says: :-)
Bigrend gives Cuddlestorm a high five!
Cuddlestorm roars with bestial vigor at Bigrend.  So fierce!
Bigrend cowers in fear at the sight of Cuddlestorm.
Firana says: Well, you guys know the drill. We tell the story, you feel free to say funny things and ask questions, just don't be a dick.
Cuddlestorm says:  /sagenod
Firana says: Tonight's story....Lor'themar Theron!
Firana says: 20 years or so ago, when Sylvanas wasn't dead, she was the Ranger-General of Silvermoon. Her second-in-command was a high elf named Lor'themar Theron.
Firana says: Lor'themar is often a fairly forgettable chap, but the devs are certain there's a badass in there somewhere, and various retcons have been added as evidence.
Lubbell says: number two?
Bigrend says: did he run the jefferson mint too?
Cuddlestorm says: Ah, evidence.
Firana says: For example, when the Amani trolls are attacking Quel'Thalas, just before the Dragonmaw orcs set the Eversong Woods aflame, Lor'themar has a quick chat with Alleria and Turalyon.
Firana says: Despite the fact that Lor'themar convinces Alleria that retreat is the best option (due to the inferno separating the Alliance forces from the rest of Quel'Thalas), it's badass because his armor is covered in the blood of his enemies at the time.
Lubbell says: chatting solves all his problems
Cuddlestorm says: They were discussing what color throw-pillows to add to the foyer.  I know the truth.
Firana says: Since his own home is on fire, he decides to go with Turalyon and Alleria down to Capital City to fight the orcs that are laying siege. Orgrim Doomhammer packs up the orcs and leaves just as Lor'themar and the other Alliance forces arrive.
Lubbell says: lol
Lubbell says: Orgrim had ADD
Bigrend says: the fashion police arrived
Firana says: This is a false example of badassery. The orcs didn't leave because of Lor'themar (though perhaps a few did), they left because Orgrim Doomhammer found out about Gul'dan's treachery.
Firana says: So Capital City is saved by the alliance of Man and Elf! (sort of)
Cuddlestorm says: Or, or, he saw our 'hero' and was like.  Oh god, nope.  Not worth it.  Let the eyeless wonder have it.
Firana says: Aaaaaaand Quel'thalas is not. Quel'thalas is saved from roasty-toasty desctruction solely by the grace of the Sunwell. This makes King Anasterian mad.
Cuddlestorm says: Mmm, roasty toasty...
Firana says: He declares that the humans had crappy leaders who brought a big mess into his home and didn't clean it up, so his elfs can't play with the humans anymore, and Lor'themar had to go back home.
Lubbell says: Anasterian was always jealous of the sunwell
Firana says: This is known as the "Screw you guys, I'm going home" tactic, later to be adopted by Genn Graymane.
Cuddlestorm says: Can't play with... humans... BUT MAWM!
Lubbell says: Had to be home before the streetlights came on
Firana says: Years pass and Lor'themar is assigned to leading the Farstriders and watching over the Sunwell. Lor'themar makes a new friend while on the job--Dar'Khan Drathir, a high-ranking elf with self-esteem issues.
Anmut says: But good taste in hats.
Cuddlestorm says: Izzat so?
Firana says: Dar'Khan has lots of questions for Lor'themar about the Sunwell, particularly its defenses. Lor'themar, presumably to make Dar'Khan feel better about himself, lets him in on the secrets of how to get past those defenses. Just a harmless little chat.
Cuddlestorm says: Oh Lorthie.  You dip.
Bigrend says: there's a thermal exhaust port directly over the main port
Lubbell says: I reveal national secrets to make my friends feel better all the time
Firana says: Lor'themar looks like the patsy he is, as Dar'Khan takes all the information he's just gained and gives it to the recently Death Knighted Arthas Menethil...and his massive army of Scourge.
Lubbell says: in exchange for self esteem?
Firana says: In an attempt to restore some badassery to Lor'themar, he's greatly wounded and loses an eye in the battle to protect Silvermoon and the Isle of Quel'Danas, in which he fails, and witnesses the defiling of the Sunwell.
Lubbell says: well... he half witnesses it...
Lubbell says: get it?
Cuddlestorm says: And now, with one eye gone, he can happily join the ranks of angsty MRP proflies everywhere!
Cuddlestorm says: HURR.
Lubbell says: MRP?
Firana says: In the massive battle, Sylvanas and just about every other leader-type of High Elf is slain, and Prince Kael'thas comes back from Dalaran just long enough to rename his people Blood Elves then run off to join the New Alliance resistance for revenge.
Firana says: Much like the Secretary of Education in Battlestar Galactica, Lor'themar finds himself to be the highest authority remaining in Silvermoon, and becomes the Regent-Lord of Quel'Thalas, with a duty to "safeguard the land and seek a cure for [the] people".
Cuddlestorm says: My Role Play.  Addon with character summary... awhile back, it was almost funny how many characters in the world had "...and then he/she lost an eye" as part of their profies.  Lorthie was totes jelly, I bet.
Firana says: So President Lor'themar and his friend Ranger-General Adama--I mean, Halduron Brightwing slowly work to try and save the people of Quel'Thalas, who are now all in withdrawl from lack of magic in addition to being overrun by Scourge.
Lubbell says: lol...
Cuddlestorm says: Scourge happens.
Firana says: Together, they gather a group of Blood Elf rangers and use guerilla tactics to drive out the Scourge forces. Our eye-patched hero gets the idea to burn all bodies to prevent them from being raised as more Scourge.
Lubbell says: He's much cooler than I'd be. If I was suddenly president, I'd spend the day mooning my enemies from a limo.
Cuddlestorm says: ...I'd do the same thing.  That... isn't cool?
Firana says: While they're romping about Quel'Thalas, Lor'themar gets word that Dar'Khan the Unappreciated is back in town (which is impressive, considering he was killed by Arthas during the Sunwell battle), and leads his rangers on a hunt for the whiny traitor.
Cuddlestorm says: MY WHOLE LIFE IS A LIE.
Firana says: They find Dar'Khan and ambush him while he's talking to this sweet, pretty blonde human named Anveena. Unfortunately, Dar'Khan has increased his own badassness a bit, and raises the skeletons of dead High Elves, which drive Lor'themar and his forces back.
Lubbell says: burn the bodies, he raises the skeletons.
Bigrend says: oh, that Anveena
Firana says: As he's retreating, Lor'themar hears the banshee-shriek of his old boss, Sylvanas Windrunner. So he goes racing back to the scene of the conflict, finding nothing but Anveena, a dark-haired lady elf called Tyri and a blue-haired half-elf named Kalec.
Firana says: Lor'themar holds them at swordpoint and tells him to drop their weapons and reveal Sylvanas' location. Kalec puts on the smooth talk and explains that Anveena's innocent but in trouble and that Dar'Khan is their enemy as well.
Lubbell says: blue hair? I've seen animes... he's the good guy.
Cuddlestorm says: lul
Bigrend says: it's also artfully tousled
Firana says: Going on appearances, Lor'themar isn't sure he can trust the word of a half-blood, and laughs when Kalec tries to tell him that he's not an elf at all, he's a dragon.
Firana says: Lor'themar and Halduron have a good chuckle over the halfsie that thinks it's a dragon, telling him to prove it.
Lubbell says: He was trying to use it as a pickup line, thought Lorethemar was a girl.
Firana says: Tyri, a bit irritated by this, spontaneous expands into her natural full-dragon form.
Lubbell says: He likes blondes
Firana says: The stop laughing.
Cuddlestorm says: SUDDENLY, DRAGONS.
Firana says: They start apologizing. A lot.
Firana says: With the whole Kalec and Tyri are actually dragons thing out of the way, Lor'themar tells the story of Sylvanas' death to his new pals, and the group decides that she probably hates Dar'Khan the mostest.
Cuddlestorm says: And repeating the mantra "No, I am NOT a frenchfry".
Firana says: lol
Firana says: As they talk, they travel to the Sunwell Grove, where Kalec aka Kalecgos reveals that Anveena is actually the human embodiment of the Sunwell's power.
Lubbell says: don't doubt that logic.
Lubbell says: I make human forms of various powres all the time
Firana says: Later, Lor'themar crosses swords with Dar'Khan again, but Dar'Khan just teases him at how ineffective he is and focuses on the dragons instead.
Izabo says: candy cane?
Firana says: Overall, Anveena wins the badass award in this fight, as she manages to awaken her Sunwell power and vaporizes Dar'Khan.
Lubbell says: the "aren't you dead" defense didn't work.
Cuddlestorm says: Oh, no thanks :3
Izabo says: candy cane?
Cuddlestorm says: Whomp whomp WHOOOOMP
Lubbell says: no thanks...
Firana says: So Lor'themar decides that Anveena needs to hide out with the Blood Elves, but keep her identity as secret. After all, they are a bunch of mage-energy addicts.
Izabo says: candy cane?
Lubbell says: she's like cocain to them...
Firana says: No, thank you. :-)
Cuddlestorm says: Walking meth lab, but, hotter
Firana says: Off in Lordaeron, it turns out the New Alliance was a waste of time, and Prince Kael'thas travels to Outland to set up a new home for his people, taking almost a fifth of the Blood Elves with him.
Cuddlestorm says: And no-one seemed to care. X-D
Firana says: Meanwhile, Grand Magister Rommath shows up on Lor'themar's doorstep with a bunch of other magisters with instructions to prepare the Blood Elves to join their prince in Outland.
Bigrend says: sure
Bigrend thanks Izabo.
Lubbell says: They were not prepared?
Izabo says: ya
Firana says: He also teaches the Blood Elves the [Mana Tap] ability, allowing them to suck the arcane energy out of other living things.
Cuddlestorm says: And then mana wyrms were suddenly an endangered species
Firana says: This is well received by most of the population, as is the magical cleansing and rebuilding of Silvermoon that took place almost overnight.
Lubbell says: He learned it in college
Firana says: So, now with his own pretty city, Lor'themar's title shifts to Regent-Lord of Quel'Thalas, and he rules in Silvermoon with Halduron and Rommath.
Cuddlestorm says: Pretty city with ALL the throw-pillahs!
Firana says: However, the Scourge still remain a threat, and Lor'themar knows he needs allies.
Lubbell says: lol
Firana says: A dwarf named Anvilward shows up claiming that the Alliance wants to welcome them back into the fold, but in truth, brings in Night Elf Sentinel Spies in secret who sabotage the arcane sanctums of the Blood Elves.
Bigrend says: if anyone can hold a grudge, it'sh a night elf
Cuddlestorm says: I'm sure that went over swimmingly!
Firana says: If you rolled a blood elf, you may remember killing that d-bag.
Lubbell says: I do, I do... i roll new BEs just to kill him
Firana says: Oddly enough, Sylvanas offers assistance, proving her worth by bolstering the manpower in the Ghostlands. Thus, Lor'themar scooches into the Horde.
Cuddlestorm says: We were here all along, he says!
Firana says: So, apparently  Dar'khan's vaporizing wasn't permanent. He comes back again with the intent, again, to steal the power of the Sunwell. /yawn
Lubbell says: look I taught my pony a trick... one trick...
Firana says: So you get to go and kill him, and this time, you bring back the head as proof to Lor'themar. This makes Lor'themar a happy regent.
Bigrend says: he made a doilie for it
Firana says: So happy, that he sends a letter of the Blood Elves' triumph with you to Thrall so they can be official, equal members of the Horde.
Lubbell says: His head is still alive trying to steal the power.
Cuddlestorm says: Details...
Firana says: Sometime later, Kael'thas comes back to Quel'Thalas, but he's all cray cray.
Firana says: He attacks the city, steals M'uru, the captive naaru that powered the Blood Knights and gave Blood Elves the Paladin Class, kidnaps Anveena, and takes the whole bundle to Magister's Terrace.
Lubbell says: wearing brown betl with black shoes
Cuddlestorm says: And we're all like "Gimmie that sweet bird and GTFO, Kael!
Bigrend says: ./gasp
Firana says: Lor'themar assures his people that everything would be cool, sure, Kael'thas is now a crazy douche-prince, but hey, they survived that other crazy douche-prince Arthas, right?
Cuddlestorm says: LOGIC.
Lubbell says: nol... most died... they didn't survive
Firana says: So everybody charges into Magister's Terrace and kills off Kael'thas. Then Anveena uses her power to go ahead and haul Kil'jaeden, Kael'thas' demonic master, into the world so HE could be killed/defeated.
Cuddlestorm says: one helluva drug
Bigrend nods at Cuddlestorm.
Firana says: Anveena fades and M'uru, also dies, but its final spark reignites the Sunwell in the purest form. The source of the Blood Elf magic had been restored, so Mana Tap was no longer needed...so the devs took it away.
Lubbell says: is that their excuse?
Cuddlestorm says: And yet the Blood Elves still have green eyes.
Cuddlestorm says: REASONS.
Firana says: I miss that racial ability. /sigh
Firana says: Lor'themar, while amazed at the whole sunwell reborn thing, is pretty stressed as he realizes that he really IS the only one left in charge now,
Bigrend says: I use it every raid...gotta squeeze every last drop of blue to heal hunters standing in fire
Firana says: and it's up to him to deal with the hurt feels from Kael'thas' betrayal AND the little civil war that's been going on between the Mana Tappers and the non Mana Tappers.
Cuddlestorm says: Mana Tappers. Great dance troupe.
Firana says: After all, there are no more Sunstriders.
Firana says: So Rommath and Halduron push for him to dress and be more kingly, but Lor'themar continues to insist that he is merely regent lord.
Firana says: Apparently, Archmage Aethas Sunreaver of the Kirin Tor has been filling up Lor'themar's in-game mailbox, and our hero just ignores them until the 30 days are up. Fed up with this, Aethas decides to just show up in Silvermoon.
Firana says: Halduron desperately tries to get Lor'themar to stop wearing his Farstrider outfit and dress more like a head of state, even offering him a [Silvermoon City Tabard], but Lor'themar shrugs it off.
Firana says: He decides to go ahead and meet with the ambitious young Blood Elf Archmage, who tells him of Malygos' ,the blue dragon aspect, new plan to eliminate all mortal spell-casters.
Cuddlestorm says: Ain't got that crying kitten on it?  Imma not wearing it! -Lor'themar
Firana says: Aethas wants the help of the Blood Elves in dealing with Malygos, asking on behalf of the Kirin Tor.
Firana says: lol
Firana says: Lor'themar thinks about it for a bit, but Rommath throws a fit and says no, stating that the Kirin Tor refused to help the Blood Elves as they were up for execution in the dungeons of Dalaran.
Bigrend says: the more things change...
Firana says: indeed
Firana says: As icing on the rage cake, Rommath further informs Aethas that the only one whose decision outranks his own is that of the Regent Lord.
Firana says: Lor'themar tells them that they both have valid points, but he's got somewhere to be, and invites Aethas to stay a while, and he'll think about it.
Lubbell says: Not even Grumpy cat was as grumpy
Firana says: So he heads down to the Quel'Lithien Lodge and gets a very cold reception. He tells the elves there of the recent events, and the Sunfury magisters, and offers to send aid.
Cuddlestorm says: Had to go to the craft store to get the purple fabric for the pillahs, he did.
Lubbell says: lol
Firana says: This, unfortunately, pisses them off. Not only were they mad about being banished for not being into Rommath's teachings (Mana Tap and all), but the Horde had recently sent people to steal a registry,  and several rangers were killed in the process.
Bigrend says: oops
Cuddlestorm says: "Oops"
Lubbell says: our bad
Firana says: Since the Forsaken are Lor'themar's allies, the blame is laid at his feet. However, due to past friendship, he's allowed to leave, and he does so, but very sadly.
Bigrend says: rp walk
Cuddlestorm says: So so sad
Firana says: lol
Cuddlestorm says: Walk o' cryin' shame.
Lubbell says: like the end of the Hulk
Firana says: When he gets back, Aethas asks Lor'themar about how the trip went, particularly if he might be able to leverage ranger-ties with Vereesa Windrunner, Sylvanas' sister, on gaining admittance to Dalaran for the Blood Elves.
Firana says: Needless to say, the answer is no.
Firana says: While Lor'themar thinks about sad things, and old rangers, and Aethas' request, Sylvanas shows up and demands that, as members of the Horde, the Blood Elves send troops to Northrend, and if they don't, she'll pull all the Forsaken out of Quel'Thalas.
Cuddlestorm says: Ah well.  Details.
Firana says: Painted into a corner, Lor'themar agrees to Sylvanas' blackmail, and further upsets Magister Rommath by agreeing to Aethas' fight against Malygos, but he's not doing it for the Kirin Tor.
Lubbell says: ...you scratch my back, or I'll stick a knife in yours.
Cuddlestorm says: Horde Motto.
Firana says: Lor'themar spends most of the events of Wrath of the Lich King trying to hold his city together, and welcoming Blood Elves and High Elves alike at the Sunwell.
Bigrend says: last time I scratched a Foresaken's back it took a week to get my fingernails clean
Lubbell says: lol
Firana says: This all goes fairly smoothly until someone shows up with a sword they claim to be the legendary Quel'Delar.
Cuddlestorm says: "IT'S COOL, WE HAVE THROW-PILLAHS"
Firana says: True to form, Lor'themar scoffs at the big mystical thing in disguise until closer inspection reveals it to actually be Quel'Delar.
Bigrend says: you've got one too?
Firana says: Apparently, if you're not a blood elf and you show up to restore the blade, Lor'themar will thank you for bringing it to its rightful owners and try to take it, and the blade throws him across the plateau. This causes a minor upset.
Cuddlestorm says: And many gigglesnorts.
Firana says: While the rest of the world is shaken by the Cataclysm, the Blood Elves are still merrily rolling in restored Sunwell, largely unchanged.
Lubbell says: he has to get his hair reset everytime it happens.
Cuddlestorm says: Oh the Blood Elves and their frolicking in the Sunwell
Firana says: lol
Firana says: Despite not wanting to be king, Lor'themar gets a little pissy when Halduron and Vol'jin invite Vereesa Windrunner and her rangers to help put down the recently reborn Amani Empire.
Lubbell says: she's into different throw pillows
Firana says: Still bitter about Sylvanas' blackmail, Lor'themar ignores her and refuses to back her up during the Horde Leader meeting with Warchief Garrosh Hellscream.
Cuddlestorm says: Throw pillahs are srs bzns.
Firana says: Afterwards, Garrosh thanks Lor'themar for his loyalty, and Lor'themar clarifies that he's loyal to the Horde, and Garrosh and The Horde are not one and the same.
Bigrend says: Lor'themar knows all about splitting hairs
Lubbell says: lol
Firana says: Lor'themar and Sylvanas both, however, refuse to participate in the Theramore attack, and instead he sends out Kelantir Bloodblade and some blood elf warriors in their place.
Cuddlestorm says: Did he 'z-snap' at the end, too?
Anmut says: Bite your tongue, that elf knows nothing about split ends.
Firana says: He doesn't escape notice for long, though. Garrosh summons Lor'themar to Pandaria for an excavation job.
Lubbell says: you're a king... get digging.
Lubbell says: makes sense...
Firana says: After arguing with Garrosh in the Shrine of Two Moons, Lor'themar pushes on and finds Mogu stuff in Kun Lai Summit. As time goes by, Garrosh's usage of the Mogu as role models becomes quite the concern for Lor'themar.
Lubbell says: mogu had terrible hair.
Firana says: When Archmage Aethas Sunreaver and Grand Magister Rommath come to blows after a sha is released in their magical experiments on a mogu device, Lor'themar reflects on his ranger past,
Cuddlestorm says: Very concerning indeed.  Terrible taste in throw pillahs to boot.
Firana says: and the similarities between Garrosh's treatment of the Blood Elves and Garithos, the racist commander of the New Alliance that got a bunch of Kael'thas's volunteers killed.
Firana says: He decides to open negotiations with Varian Wrynn to try and get Quel'Thalas back in the Alliance. This is going fairly well, until a Sunreaver under the command of Garrosh portals into Darnassus, steals the [Divine Bell] and sends it to Silvermoon.
Cuddlestorm says: HELLS BELLS!
Firana says: lol
Bigrend says: Dresden?
Lubbell says: it was going well... they were exchanging shampoo techniques.
Firana says: Jaina, enraged that someone within Dalaran would help the Horde, purges Dalaran of Sunreavers, many of which are killed or imprisoned. Rommath manages a small rescue mission, but couldn't get them all.
Cuddlestorm says: Oh Jaina, how I missed her.
Cuddlestorm says: NOT.
Firana says: Lor'themar is unhappy that Jaina's purge has driven the blood elves back into the Horde, and hates Garrosh for buying the Bell with the blood of the blood elves. Rommath comments that .
Firana says: (Chad was really excited about that red herring, too)
Lubbell says: I was....
Cuddlestorm says: :c
Firana says: When the Thunder King returns, Lor'themar gathers the Sunreaver Onslaught to claim Lei Shen's weaponry as leverage against Garrosh.
Firana says: The devs apparently realized he hadn't been badass in too long and it was time to put him back into combat.
Lubbell says: Mostly he just stands around handing out dailies
Cuddlestorm says: Time to take out that other eye, they says
Firana says: So Lor'themar allies with the Shado-Pan, builds the Dawnseeker Promontory, and sends the Horde against the Kirin Tor base camp and the Zandalari.
Lubbell says: he doesn't need two ears...
Cuddlestorm says: Or two legs.
Lubbell says: or two eyebrows
Firana says: Finally, they attack the stronghold, fighting Shan Bu's legions. Once the legions fall, they attack the other folks who were fighting Shan Bu, the Alliance.
Cuddlestorm says: Suckas!
Firana says: Lor'themar and Jaina fight for a bit until Taran Zhu tells them to quit their bitching and move on. They manage a small peace, but Jaina (clearly trying to get the last word) states that no true peace can be achieved while Garrosh rules the Horde.
Bigrend says: when Taran Zhu is the voice of reason...
Firana says: Lor'themar basically tells her, duh, that's why he's not fighting anymore today, which makes Jaina act a little less crazy.
Cuddlestorm says: ...that and the prozac he slipped in her mage water.
Firana says: While Lor'themar is still trying to get the magical golems he took from the Isle of Thunder put together, Vol'jin rushes ahead with the rebellion. Which pushes Garrosh into wrecking the Vale of Eternal Blossoms.
Anmut says: well, Kalecgos is slipping her something too..
Cuddlestorm says: HUYK
Firana says: lol
Lubbell says: I came in like a wrecking BALL!!!!
Bigrend says: lol
Cuddlestorm says: Blaaaaargh :x
Firana says: Lor'themar, Lorwalker Cho, and Jaina find Gorehowl abandoned in the Vault of Y'Shaarj, and then return to storm Bladefist Bay.
Firana says: After the fall of Garrosh, Lor'themar accepts Thrall's naming of Vol'jin as Warchief (after all, Vol'jin got a novel--Lor'themar didn't), and gracefull admits that he finds politics exhausting, so more power to our new Trollish Overlord.
Lubbell says: I, for one, welcome our new troll overloard
Cuddlestorm says: Also, he has dem fancy throw pillahs to make
Firana says: And that is the story so far for Lor'themar Theron!
Bigrend cheers!
Lubbell says: woot.

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Transcript: Lore-ytime 12/9/2012 - Guest Story! - Illidan

by Lessonsinlore, 129 days ago

For those who missed it, here's the transcript from Monday night's Lore-ytime Event, featuring special guest lore-yteller, Asherondei aka @TrollingAzeroth! Catch us in Orgrimmar in The Broken Tusk (just inside the gates and to the right, two doors down) Monday nights at 10pm server time on Earthen Ring (US)!

 

Firana says: I'm Megan
Lazharus says: Hello
Lubel says: And we're from Lessonsinlore.com
Thwackup says: hello
Lubel says: Every week we tell stories from Warcraft... however...
Firana says: we've contracted the plague.
Lubel says: this week, Megan and I have been knocking on death's door
Bigrend says: Nathrezim grain distributors?
Lubel says: So tonight we've got a special lore-yteller for you all
Firana says: lol
Firana says: Yup!
Firana says: You may know him from twitter as Trolling Azeroth, (or his webcomic of the same name)
You point at Asherondei.
Lazharus claps excitedly.
Asherondei bows down graciously.
Lubel says: We'd like to thank Ash for stepping in for us
Bigrend says: huzzah
Pornar claps excitedly for Asherondei.
Lubel says: We really really weren't up for a lore-ytime tonight
Asherondei says: My pleasure!  Although I hope you both feel better!
Thwackup cheers at Asherondei!
Lubel says: So for all of you who are new...
Lazharus says: Yes, a speedy recovery to both
Firana says: Thanks
Lubel says: these are not quiet events.
Lubel says: If you have questions or comments, just go ahead and shout them out.
Lubel says: Though we abide by Wheton's law here... don't be a dick
Lubel says: So with that... We turn it over to you, Ash.
You cheer at Asherondei.
Asherondei says: Thanks guys  :)
Asherondei says: Tonight I'll be telling the tale of one of my favorite NPCs...
Lubel says: Garrosh
Asherondei says: ...hence my guild name  :D
Bigrend says: Malfurian?
Asherondei says: no, no...he's related, so i can't pick him
Lubel says: Chromie
Firana says: holy role reversal, batman
Asherondei says: Our story begins a little over 10,000 years ago in the sleepy Night Elven village of Suramar...
Lubel says: Batman isn't an NPC... /shakes head
Asherondei says: Here twin brothers, Illidan and Malfurion Stormrage, and their bestest gal pal Tyrande Whisperwind , were quietly becoming the talk of the town
Asherondei says: It was kind of like the relationship we see between Harry, Ron, and Hermioine in the Harry Potter books...
Asherondei says: If one of the two guys didn't suck...
Lubel says: or edward bella and Jacob
Asherondei says: And Ron was much better at magic than Harry...
Asherondei says: ...or Tyrande wasn't a manipulative tease...
Hothorodben laughs.
Lubel says: And hermione was the Harry-est of all
Asherondei says: Ok...so its nothing like Harry Potter at all.
Thwackup wonders how the stories are connected.
Lubel says: though warts were involved
Asherondei says: The twins were not only gifted magically, they were both destined for greatness.  Night Elf legend states that thos eborn with amber eyes were meant to be legen....WAIT FOR IT...DARY.
Bigrend says: nailed it
Lubel says: Because they're orange?
Asherondei says: And both brothers had them. Malfurion was the golden boy and prized pupil of Cenarius, himself, Night Elf demi-god. Druidism was his calling.
Asherondei says: But since we really don't give a crap about Druids tonight, we'll concentrate on Illidan's mastery of the Arcane.
Miku says: :(
Asherondei says: He learned to push 1,1,1,2 with the best of them and really had no patience for talking to trees and playing with flowers.
Lubel gently pats Miku.
Bigrend says: Is Rhonin going to show up in this story?
Lubel says: that's the first patch ever
Asherondei says: a little  :)
Asherondei says: So we can see early on, that the brotherly love was going to get a nice kick square in the jimmy.
Asherondei says: Tyrande giggling at their jokes and batting her eyes at them didn't help either.
Lubel says: I thought you said she wasn't a tease
Synndrá cuddles up against Nekksis.
Bigrend says: she just read too much Shojou manga
Lubel says: The eye thing was just her Glaucoma though...
Asherondei says: It was around this tim that Azshara, Queen of the Night Elves, decided to thrust herself onto the dating scene by creating a profile on IMGOINGTOSCREWYOUALL.COM
Firana says: lol
Asherondei says: ...and of course, Tyrande is a tease   :)
Asherondei says: no lie there
Lubel says: Turn ons include Walks on the beach, Power, and Merciless desire to rule the universe... or destroy it.
Asherondei says: The first hit Azshara got came straight from the Twisting Nether in the form of Sargeras, Lord of the Burning Legion.  And just like a Versace purse, she had to have him, no matter the cost.
Bigrend says: I blame Chris Metzen
Lubel says: It was for her world destroyer collection
Asherondei says: Ordering her Highborne magi to dial up the Well of Eternity, Azshara turned the most powerful magical item this side of Emma Watson' spre-nup, into the largest portal in the history of Azeroth.
Lubel says: Little known fact, Emma Watson's prenup... also hairy...
Asherondei says: The Burning Legion came storming through to start preparing for the arrival of Sargeras and to domesticate the native population.
Pornar says: and gaping
Lubel says: preparing for arrival meaning they were setting up the buffet table
Pornar says: did they have bacon?
Asherondei says: It was here that Illidan set upon his path to greatness and started laying the foundation to becoming an endgame raid boss.
Bigrend says: the quillboar bacon comes later
Lubel says: He developed his first aggro range, huh?
Asherondei says: In order to impress Tyrande, whome he had fallen madly in love with, he decided that he would single-handedly fight the Legion himself!
Lubel says: what was he using the other hand for?
Lazharus says: well, he didnt have Tyrande yet...
Bigrend says: zing
Asherondei says: Keep in mind, when the invasion started, this kicked off the beggest shindig since Nozdormu had that 3 month kegger back in June.
Lubel says: Hand Solo and the Mellenium Fondlecan
Lazharus laughs.
Asherondei says: ...and eventually I'll learn to type
Asherondei says: lol
Pornar laughs.
Asherondei says: So naturally got involved, including the Dragonflights.
Lubel says: They changed their status on facebook to "involved"
Bigrend says: with Neltharion chaing his to "It's Complicated"
Asherondei says: The Night Elves were an arrogant lot, to be sure, but they weren't pushovers.  While the Legion won early victories on surprise alone, the Night Elves rallied their forces and started to hold their own.
Bigrend says: chancing*
Bigrend hurls keyboard across the room
Lubel says: hold their own... mellenium fondlecans
Asherondei says: With the help of clever editing and ret-conning, they also got th ehelp of Rhonin, Krasus, and Broxigar.  And the Tauren.  And the Dwarves.  And of course, the Dragons.
Asherondei says: lol
Lubel says: I'm sure after the next expansion Orcs and Draenei will have helped them too.
Bigrend says: they had Broxigar, the Chuck Norris of Orcs
Asherondei says: So Azshara threw a war and everyone came.  Neltharion, leader of the Black Dragonflight, picked this opportune time to become lead candidate for the Asshat of the Year award, and unveil his new weapon the Demon Soul.
Lubel says: Still had the the tags on too.
Asherondei says: this threw everything into chaos as he attacked both Demons and mortals.  With everything in disarray, the competing armies withdrew to regroup, and Neltharion (now known as Deathwing) was beaten back to his secret volcano lair.
Asherondei says: Illidan, being the smart cookie he is, knew that the best way to win over Tyrande and beat the Demons and impress Azshara, was to steal the Demon Soul and use it for his own gains.
Lubel says: I'll become evil too. That'll win her heart.
Asherondei says: Hey...the guy was in love, all right?  We all do stupid stuff when we're head over heels for someone.
Pornar says: So he was prepared.
Asherondei says: So a team lead by Illidan and a team lead by Malfurion, go traipsing off trying to steal the Demon Soul from a large, lunatic dragon.  It was the first heroic 10-man.
Lubel says: lol
Bigrend says: they went into his secret alir on Skullcrusher Mountain?
Bigrend says: lair*
Asherondei says: Through chicanery and epic gumption, Illidan lets Malfurion's team get it first...then promptly steals it from him.
Lubel says: Sounds more like a high school prank... we got the other team's mascot... WOOHOO!!!
Asherondei says: Because he deserved it.
Asherondei says: And Tyrande would never fall for such a gullible deadbeat.
Lubel says: her turnons include ungullible people, chocolates, and cuddling up with a man shaped like an animal
Pornar says: but he had a back up girl
Asherondei says: With Demon Soul in hand, Illidan marches straight back to the Night Elven capital and hands the Demon Soul over to Azshara, who was totally making on him the whole time.  She then brags about Illidan to Sargeras himself.
Asherondei says: lol
Miku says: So you're saying I got a shot?
Synndrá blows Nekksis a kiss.
Nekksis blows Synndrá a kiss.
Asherondei says: Sargeras, being someone who recognizes awesomeness, decided to bestow a gift to Illidan by making him watch the Twilight Saga, burning out his eyes and giving him arcane tattoos....and filling him full of demonic energies.
Asherondei says: All I know is that when i tried to watch Twilight, I got none of those things, except the burned out eyes part.
Lubel says: I don't want to know the application device he used to fill anyone with demonic energies
Asherondei says: well....you can't get it at Target
Bigrend says: this might sting a little
Lazharus says: take a deep breath
Lubel says: bite down on the pillow, Illidan
Bigrend chuckles at Lubel.
Asherondei says: Still hung up on Tyrande, Illidan uses his new powers to plot against the Legion and Azshara, by indirectly helping Tyrande and the others disrupt the Demon Soul powered portal for Sargeras.
Lubel says: they unplugged the router
Asherondei says: Ok, so maybe no one knew at the tim that collapsing the portal onto itself would rip the continent into two...er...three...oh fine, FOUR major pieces.
Bigrend says: by clicking on it then moving to interrupt the channel?
Pernstar waves at Asherondei.
Asherondei waves at Pernstar.
Pernstar greets everyone warmly.
Lubel says: My guess is that it'll wind up being six
Lazharus greets Pernstar warmly.
Asherondei says: Besides Illidan was smart enough to grab 7 vials of the magical water from the Well before it exploded.
Bigrend says: because attunements
Lubel says: well they were selling them at the giftshop.
Asherondei says: Once the Legion got sucked back into the Twisting nether and Azshara and the traitrous Highborne got turned into Naga, kicking and screaming all the way down the ocean floor, everyone was still /sadface
Lubel says: evolution takes millions of years... you know, except when it doesn't.
Bigrend says: Old Gods (tm)
Asherondei says: Illidan, however, being the eternal optimist decided to celebrate the victory by turning a small, tranquil lake at the top of Mt. Hyjal into the new Well of Eternity.
Asherondei says: Everyone would finally love him and make him ruler of all of Elfdom!  And Tyrande would shower him with kisses!
Asherondei says: Except none of those things happened.
Lubel says: or shower at all, she has horrible BO
Asherondei says: Malfurion, somehow got elected leader, Tyrande professed her love for him in front of everybody, and Illidan got thrown in the slammer.
Asherondei says: I can't imagine him being bitter at all.
Bigrend says: and had to hang out with Maiev
Lubel says: somehow, indeed. Teh sign that said "Must have horns this tall to vote" helped.
Asherondei says: lol
Asherondei says: So...after Illidan got punked by Sargeras himself...AND he saved the Night Elves...AND Azeroth...AND created a new Well, what thanks does he get?
Bigrend says: didn't he get the horns and wings after getting sprung from jail by Tyrande
Asherondei says: that part is coming Big  :)
Bigrend says: sorry
Asherondei says: lol
Lubel says: spoilers, dude.
Bigrend hangs his head in shame
Asherondei says: He got 10,000 in the Big House for his troubles.
Pernstar says: when does wilson come in
Lubel says: imagine if he only dropped the soap once every human lifetime... that's still a lot of soap dropping.
Asherondei says: Thanks to his brother not having th enads to just execute Illidan on the spot, Illidan (now known as THE BETRAYER....pfffft) sat brooding for over 10 millenia.
Asherondei says: The Night Elves banished those that still wanted to practice Arcane magic and Druidism became the Night Elf way...tied hand in hand with the Priests of Elune
Asherondei says: Everything was going swimmingly, until our good pals, the Burning Legion came a'knockin' again.  This tim they went all rogue and came in through the back door on the Eastern kingdoms.
Lubel says: rogues, priests, and warriors? Second class citizens.
Bigrend says: go green or go to the Eastern Kingdons?
Asherondei says: ...and a horrible 3v3 team Chad!
Lubel says: Back door antics... that sounds like the burning legion... you know, cus it burns
Asherondei says: The Night Elven leadership, which consisted of Tyrande, Malfurion, and Fandral Staghelm, bickered over what to do.  Not only was the Legion pressing again, but there were strange beings in the forest of Kalimdor and that didn't sit well with the xenophobi
Asherondei says: ...xenophobic Night Elves.
Lubel says: here's an idea... let's not get involved until War 3
Asherondei says: Tyrande, in a rare moment of lucidity, suggested that Illidan be freed, so they could use his talents and knowledge to fight the Legion off.  Malfurion, always the douchebag, squashed that idea pretty quickly.   "HUSH TYRANDE"
Bigrend says: stay classy Mal
Asherondei says: So what does Tyrande do?  She storms the prison, killing all the Night Elf Sentinels, and frees Illidan to do what he does best:  BE AWESOME.
Lubel says: He's sleeping on the couch for a few mellenia
Bigrend says: cough*Morrowgrain*cough
Lazharus says: Still being a tease?
Lubel says: nah... a gold digger
Lubel says: use his love to get what she wants... then dump him
Asherondei says: Things got messy very quickly.  Illidan, who still had the hots for Tyrande, took off like a bandit with some Night Elf forces, and started hunting the Legion wherever he could find them.
Asherondei says: Arthas, now a Death Knight taking orders from the Lich King, tracked Illidan down in Felwood and the two fought just long enough to ensure a rematch down the road.
Lubel says: See you in about 20 levels
Asherondei says: Post-fight, Arthas told Illidan about the Skull of Gul'dan, a very powerful artifact that could aid in the defeat of the Burning Legion.  Illidan, who loved Power like a fat kid loves cake, jumped on the story and not only found the Skull....
Asherondei says: ...but consumed it wholly.
Lubel says: skulls are super full of power, aren't they skelator?
Bigrend says: because Orc skulls taste good?
Asherondei says: lol
Lubel says: That must've hurt when he passed it wholly
Asherondei says: If you think demonic eyes and arcane tattoos are cool...then you'll love the wings and hooves he got next!
Lubel says: OW, the tusks...
Bigrend says: maybe Nelfs can unhinge their jaws
Lubel says: and horns... don't forget the horns
Asherondei says: Badassery had arrived....and its name was Illidan.
Lubel says: Bigrend, it wasn't going IN that I was worried about it hurting
Bigrend says: ...oh...ow
Lubel says: right?
Lazharus says: well he had been in prison for a while
Bigrend says: lol
Asherondei says: By this time, Tyrande and Malfurion had caught up to illidan and became uppity and disgusted at the sight of him.  Malfurion banished him from Night Elf lands and Tyrande didn't even hug him goodbye.
Lubel says: gold digger
Asherondei says: Maiev Shadowsong, leader of the Sentinels and jailer ot Illidan, was also pretty pissed and began to dog him all over Kalimdor.l
Lubel says: She followed him like a fat guy follows the McRib
Asherondei says: While on th erun, Illidan was approache by Kil'jaeden the Deceiver, the second in command of the Burning Legion, and offered a deal: he would overlook Illidan's transgressions against the Legion, if Illidan would travel north and take out the Lich King.
Lubel says: No portals necessary, huh?
Asherondei says: After an extra boost in power, Illidan took him up on the offer and proceeded to recruit some help along the way.
Bigrend says: Illidan's still a mage
Asherondei says: portals?  where we're going..we don't need portals!
Lubel says: I meant for Kil'jaeden
Bigrend says: he can summon a table too
Bigrend says: oh, nah, he was telecommuting
Asherondei says: Illidan managed to grab Lady Vash'j of the Naga and her forces, and Kael'Thas Sunstrider, leader of the Blood Elves and newly baptized victim of human racism.
Lubel says: but it wasn't good racism, they kept offering him orange soda and fried chicken
Lazharus laughs at Asherondei.
Asherondei says: Together, the 3 hatched a plan to not only kill Ner'zhul, the Lich King, but to do so in style!  Still running from Maiev Shadowsong, illidan and his compatriots sailed for the distant shores of Lordaeron.
Lubel says: How do you kill a guy in Northrend? By sailing to Lordaeron, of course.
Bigrend says: connecting flight..cheaper tickets
Asherondei says: After continuing to elude Maiev and picking up more magical artifacts along the way, Illidan's forces landed in Lordaeron and made their way to Dalaran.
Lubel says: Maiev is actually a CIA opperative spying on people playing Warcraft.
Asherondei says: there, using all of his accumulated powers to date, illidan started ripping apart the polar ice caps which woul dhave destroyed icecrown Citadel and Northrend...and Azeroth.  But we're not going to quibble over details.
Asherondei says: And Maiev is totally a CIA operative....
Lubel says: all his power, huh? Including breadmaking?
Asherondei says: but its really stale and hard...
Lubel says: stale and hard... that's Illidan alright
Asherondei says: Right when the spell was about to magically climax, Illidan was interrupted by Malfurion and Maiev.  Maiev, ever looking for an edge to recapture or kill Illidan, straight up lied to Malfurion.
Asherondei says: 5....4......3.....2....1......
Lubel says: I hate it when I'm about to climax and my brother walks in...
Lubel says: BOOM!
Asherondei says: BAZINGA
Lubel says: nailed it
Asherondei says: lol
Lazharus claps excitedly.
Bigrend laughs at Lubel.
Asherondei says: Maiev told him that tyrande had been killed by the Undead forces on Kalimdor and that Illidan should feel horrible and throw himself off of a cliff.
Lubel says: Maiev's turnons include long walks around the earth, telling people their loved ones are dead, and Ayn Rand books.
Asherondei says: Thankfully, Kael'Thas knew that tyrande was still alive and called Maiev's bluff.  Malfurion, showing tha the could do more than sleep for a thousand years at a time, arrested Maiev on the spot.
Asherondei says: Illidan immediately went to go try and find and rescue Tyrande.  Yep...after all the crap she had put him through, he still loved her and wanted her bod.
Lubel says: You guys know when I say "Golddigger" that you should sing it like "Goldfinger" right?
Asherondei says: Afterfighting through a small army of Undead, illidan did manage to find and save her...and to her surprise, he took her back to Malfurion.  Did Illidan's turning over a new leaf make her the wiser about which borther to choose?
Asherondei says: NOPE.  She still went with the douchebag.
Lubel says: he did drive the better car
Bigrend says: she digs guys with beaks and feathers
Lubel says: "no honey, I hate how fast you are in travel form... do the bear form again.
Asherondei says: Illidan, knowing that Kil'jaeden was going to be pissed at him for failing to kill the Lich King, decided to leave Azeroth while the leaving was good, and hopped a portal to Outland.
Asherondei says: Maiev, ever fixated on hunting Illidan down (because she secretly wants him), followed him to Outland and managed to catch him.  However, she didn't account for Vash'j and Kael'Thas helping him out.
Asherondei says: Now free once again, Illidan went about building up whatever forces he could find to secure Outland as his own.  This included Akama and his Broken, who had been losing to Fel Orcs and Demons from the Burning Legion.
Lubel says: not at fighting, they were terrible chess players. Always losing to the orcs and demons
Asherondei says: With these forces at his command, Illidan managed to attack and take the Black Temple from Magtheridon.  He then imprisoned the Demon commander beneath hellfire Citadel and used his blood to make more Fel Orcs.
Lubel says: had a tap installed on Magtheridon's tail.
Asherondei says: Just when Illidan thought he was in the clear, Kil'jaeden showed up and reminded everyone why he's the head cheese.  He wanted to kill them all right there, but Illidan's little posse did show some promise, so he decided to give them one more chance.
Lubel says: BRING ME.... A SHRUBBERY!!!
Asherondei says: He wanted Illidan to finish what he started and kill the Lich King, once and for all.  So like a good little scolded puppy, Illidan and his merry band of rogues (and a mage) set off for Northrend once again.
Lubel says: Did they miss and land in Lordaeron again?
Asherondei says: the fight to get to Icecrown was epic, to be sure.  While Illidan was mowing down the Undead and giant spider things, Arthas and his group were mowing down Demons and Blood Elves.
Asherondei says: Siri helped them out this time with navigation....they got rid of the blackberrys
Lubel says: Gah, with Siri helping, I'm surprised they didn't end up in Deepholme
Bigrend says: Teleport with error?>
Asherondei says: It was inevitable that the two would clash...and clash they did.  So in the snows of Northrend the two heavyweights of their day went at it demon y death knight.
Lubel says: that's a Brazzers film, yeah?
Lazharus says: lol
Asherondei says: To be fair, Arthas won the fith and kicked Illidan's ass.  However, to hear illidan tell it Arthas cheated; tried to steal Tyrande; took some Night Elven kids' lunch money; and didn't put the toilet seat down after taking a whiz.
Asherondei says: Does that sound insane?  Well good...because insane is where Illidan decided to camp out after losing and nearly bleeding out in the snows of Northrend.
Lubel says: He just layed there making Snow angels for years
Asherondei says: Kael'Thas and Vash'j managed to save Illidan and take him back to Outland...just as Arthas was putting on the Dmeonic ice-encased armor and becoming the Lich King.
Bigrend says: I wonder if all those concubines in Black Temple were surrogates for Tyrande
Lubel says: Being Lich King is all about fashionable armor
Asherondei says: So our hero..now half baked...and fully delusional continued to build his army in Outland, fully convinced that he had defeated Arthas and that no one loved him.
Lubel says: he was half right...
Asherondei says: He was so out of it, that his pals, Kael and Vash'j stopped visiting him altogether.  He became that crazy Uncle that no one likes to sit beside at the holiday meals...too much blabbering and not enough liquor to drown it out.
Asherondei says: Perhaps he started hitting grandpa's cough syrup just a bit too much, because he failed to notice the army of adventurers that came to Outland looking for phat lewts and legendary weapons.
Lubel says: Crazy Uncle's turn ons include talking about "the Government", Shows that're no longer on the air, and commenting on your appearance in really uncomfortable ways.
Bigrend applauds at Asherondei.  Bravo!
Asherondei says: Because they broke into the Black Temple and helped Maiev Shadowsong (the woman just won't die) and Akama beat illidan down.
Lubel says: Maiev Shadowsong... dead, by the way.
Bigrend says: well of course, they made her crazy and evil
Asherondei says: But who knows kids.....did Illidan really die, alone and broken, atop the Black Temple?  Or did the Lord of Awesomeness...the one who was framed as a villain, but was actually a hero....escape to fight another day?
Asherondei says: Crazier things have happened!
Lazharus claps excitedly.
Lubel says: like trying to pass an orc skull...
Asherondei says: And that is the tale of Illidan
Lubel says: WOO HOO
Bigrend says: Bravo!
Asherondei bows down graciously.
You cheer at Asherondei.
Lubel claps excitedly for Asherondei.
Lubel says: Thank you, so much, Ash.
Asherondei says: Thank you for listening!
Karamya says: thanks for a great tale  !
Lazharus says: Thank you all so much
Lubel says: Guys... thank you all for coming.
Asherondei says: I hope you enjoyed it.
Karamya nods at you.
Lubel says: I want to thank Ash for being awesome and stepping in while Megan and I recover from Bubanic fever
Karamya waves goodbye to everyone.  Farewell!
Asherondei says: :D  You're very welcome.
Lubel says: And thanks everybody for coming out, we do these every Monday at 10PM, right here.
Lubel says: Thank you all, so much.

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Lessons in Lore, the people who performed World of Warcraft: The Story Thus Far at D*Con 2010, 2011, 2012 and 2013. Our unique presentation teaches you the lore without the bore. Find us in game on the Timeless Isle as Watcher Megana and Warden Chad!
 
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